| Subject: Help Desk This has got to be one of the funniest I've heard of in a long time. I think this guy should have been promoted, not fired. This is a true story from the Word Perfect Help line which was transcribed from a recording monitoring the customer care department. Needless to say the Help Desk employee was fired; however, he/she is currently suing the Word Perfect organization for "Termination without Cause" (now I know why they record these conversations!). PC Tech: "Ridge Hall computer assistance; may I help you?" Customer: "Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect." PC Tech: "What sort of trouble?" Customer: "Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away." PC Tech: "Went away?" Customer: "They disappeared." PC Tech: "Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?" Customer: "Nothing." PC Tech: "Nothing?" Customer: "It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type." PC Tech: "Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?" Customer: "How do I tell?" PC Tech: "Can you see the C: prompt on the screen?" Customer: "What's a sea-prompt?" PC Tech: "Never mind, can you move your cursor around the screen?" Customer: "There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type." PC Tech: "Does your monitor have a power indicator?" Customer: "What's a monitor?" PC Tech: "It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on?" Customer: "I don't know." PC Tech: "Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the powercord goes into it. Can you see that?" Customer: "Yes, I think so." PC Tech: "Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall." Customer: "Yes, it is." PC Tech: "When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one?" Customer: "No." PC Tech: "Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable." Customer: "Okay, here it is." PC Tech: "Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer." Customer: "I can't reach." PC Tech: "Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is?" Customer: "No." PC Tech: "Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over?" Customer: "Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle - it's because it's dark." PC Tech: "Dark?" Customer: "Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window." PC Tech: "Well, turn on the office light then." Customer: "I can't." PC Tech: "No? Why not?" Customer: "Because there's a power failure." PC Tech: "A power...A power failure? Aha, Okay, we've got it licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer came in?" Customer: "Well, yes, I keep them in the closet." PC Tech: "Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from." Customer: "Really? Is it that bad?" PC Tech: "Yes, I'm afraid it is." Customer: "Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?" PC Tech: "Tell them you're too damn stupid to own a computer." |