 |
The larger the number the newer the
reason
247. When Picard marries a couple, he
doesn't lose the groom in battle.
246. Picard can speak in more languages than Kirk has ever heard.
245. Kirk was the first captain to see a Romulan, but Picard went to
Romulus & kicked their butts.
244. Kirk never met an alien female he didn't like...
243. Kirk bested an old, tired has-been called Apollo, while Picard
has bested an omnipotent being several times.
242. What really happened when
Picard and Kirk met.
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Picard talking to a friend, the groundskeeper
of Starfleet Academy. |
241. Picard has better taste in
recreation (who needs a local bar when you've got a holodeck).
240. Picard looks better as a detective than Kirk does as a gangster.
239. Picard would never allow anyone to shoot close ups of his face in
soft focus like Kirk does (OmniPrime)
238. Picard saved the Federation from the space bugs.
237. Picard became a Borg and Borg Queen fell and love with him. Kirk
became a woman. (OmniPrime)
236. Picard can quote Shakespeare & doesn't need spectacles to read
it.
235. Picard can fence.
234. Picard makes a better Romulan than Kirk does.
233. Picard is a wine connoisseur.
232. Picard punches Ferengi better than Kirk ever punched the Klingons
of the first series.
231. Picard never let a bald midget in a dwarf ship with a scary dummy
fake him out for an entire episode.
230. Picard didn't let some female with a loose screw take over his
body & his ship while sticking him in her body.
229. Picard hasn't EVER had to spend an entire episode ridding his
ship of furry hairballs which reproduce.
228. Picard doesn't lose as many red shirts.
227. Picard has killed Klingons in hand to hand combat on several
different occasions.
226. Picard has broken the Prime Directive at least a dozen times.
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Picard the diplomat. |
225. Picard can swear in Klingon.
224. Kirk never climbed a turbo shaft with a foxy lady & got it on in
the bowels of the ship.
223. Kirk never mind melded with a Vulcan to help the VULCAN with his
self control.
222. When Kirk was 12 he was learning how to drive a tractor. When
Picard was 12 he was able to thwart a group of Ferengi that captured
the Enterprise and enslaved the crew.
221. Picard got more respect from Klingons than Kirk ever did, even
when Picard reverted back to the physical appearance of a twelve year
old.
220. Picard has the willpower to repeatedly insult his Cardasian
captor while being tortured (Chain of Command Part II) (Omni Prime)
219. When Shatner went on "The Weakest Link" Star Trek edition, Wil
Wheaton (Wesley Crusher) survived much longer than Shatner. Wesley
Crusher, the boy that piloted Picard's Enterprise, is smarter than the
great Kirk himself? Do you have any idea how pitiful that is? lol
(Omni Prime)
218. When Shatner went on "The Weakest Link" Star Trek edition, he
thought the roman numeral for 100 was "X". Heh heh, isn't it common
knowledge that X is the roman numeral for 10??? No wonder their five
year mission only lasted three years. (Omni Prime)
217. When Shatner went on "The Weakest Link" Star Trek edition, he was
the second person voted off. John de Lancie (Q) was the first if you
care. But guess who won? It was Picard's Chief Engineer, Geordi
LaForge. (Picard was not on the show, but of course someone from TNG
would win) The person who was very close to winning was the HoloDoc
from Star Trek: Voyager. (Omni Prime)
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Picard briefing his crew before the Enterprise-E's final
battle, which I do believe to be the best battle scene Star Trek
ever made, the second best being Kirk vs. Khan in Star Trek II. |
216. Kirk's
chief engineer could fix just about anything on the Enterprise. Just one of Picard's
engineers could do that as well as argue
intelligently with Einstein. He also took the Enterprise to the center of the galaxy, discovered everything there was to know about the universe and then
reduced it to one simple equation. (Omni Prime).
215. The
Enterprise-D set the record for the number of times a starship could be blown
up in a single episode. The Enterprise-D blew up four times in 44 minutes. Let's see
Kirk's Enterprise do that! (Cause and Effect) (Omni Prime)
214. No one can say "Abandon Ship! Repeat! All Hands
Aband--[Enterprise blows up]" better than Picard. (Cause and Effect)
(Omni Prime)
213. Picard has the balls to stand among hundreds of
Klingons and argue with them.
212. Kirk never knew Scotty lied to him
about the status of the engines because he didn't understand the Enterprise
didn't use gas.
211. Picard's science officer has a detachable
head.
210. Kirk Quote: "Oochy Woochy Coochy Coo!" (Friday's Child) Awww! Kirk is trying to speak more like an adult! Maybe he might be
able to get rid of those awkward pauses this time. (Omni
Prime)
209. Picard thwarted a group of terrorists on the Enterprise-D
alone with a little creativity and a crossbow (Starship Mine). (Omni Prime)
208. Picard has quotes like: "Let's make
sure history never forgets the name Enterprise" (Yesterday's Enterprise). (Omni Prime)
207. Stewart hasn't stooped to the level of
doing dot com commercials like Shatner has.
206. Picard can beat a
Vulcan in hand to hand combat.
205. Kirk was a woman (Turnabout Intruder
episode).
204. Stuff like
The Captain Picard Rap: Make It
So. (It
gets better towards the end).
203. Kirk saved Earth by time traveling
and transporting two whales. When Kirk returned to Earth after this he was
demoted. Picard saved Earth by time traveling, assisting in Earth's First
Contact (which forever changed the course of humanity), blowing up a Borg cube
and a Borg sphere, slaughtering countless Borg drones, assisting in the
assassination of the Borg Queen, and overseeing humanity's first light speed
jump. Which would look better on a resume? (Omni Prime)
202. When
Picard has a holiday he goes home, gets drunk and brawls. Kirk sits at a
camp-fire toasting marshmallows while singing "Row row row your boat" .
201. Picard ate Romulan soup and didn't even flinch. Much.
200. Picard doesn't need to jump through big stone doughnuts to travel
in time.
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Picard on trial to save Humanity |
199. Remember the time when the Captain of the Enterprise was
a slow-moving, monosyllabic automaton with a funny name? But enough about
Kirk, how about those TNG battle scenes? (Omni Prime)
198. Kirk
only managed to make himself look relatively attractive by carefully selecting
his crew; contrast is everything.
197. Picard would never let his son
get killed by Klingons.
196. Two words: Command presence.
195.
If Kirk ever met a Ferengi, he'd probably try to mate with it.
194.
Kirk's First Officer played some form of Vulcan harp, an instrument that makes
the trombone look like just about the most macho thing this side of Kirk's
wig.
193. How many innocent yellow-shirted security officers have been
killed by crazed aliens who had taken pot shots at them in the mistaken belief
that they were actually shooting at Kirk. Picard has sent far less people to
their death than Kirk (not counting Locutus).
192. Kirk commands his ship as if he's driving a
tractor across an Iowa wheat field.
191. When Picard was 37, he was
the Captain of the lowly Stargazer. This was because Starfleet had realized
the value of "progressive experience" having witnessed the disastrous
consequences of letting someone take charge of a real ship when their previous
vehicular experience extended only as far as driving a tractor across an Iowa
wheat field.
190. If Kirk had a doctor like Beverly Crusher, Starfleet
would have to relocate the command chair in sick-bay.
189. Picard
isn't afraid to go places without a security team.
188. Picard doesn't
wear pansy sailor-boy markings on his cuffs.
187. Picard has
shuttlecraft that can travel faster than Kirk's ship.
186. Picard was
actually in his own show's pilot episode.
185. Picard never visits
planets that look suspiciously like a Californian desert. This goes to both
Kirk and Janeway.
184. Picard won't spend his retirement writing
science fiction books or making cameo appearances in Zemeckis & Zemeckis
films.
183. Picard was never demoted to a lieutenant in the L.A.
Police Department.
182. Picard's doctor doesn't have to keep reminding
him what her job is.
181. Picard doesn't have to operate his turbo
lifts using hand pumps. Behold the wonders of voice command!
180. Picard's main viewer is a 200 inch hi-definition TV with
Nicam and Pro-Logic surround-sound. What does Kirk have?
179. Picard's
ego wouldn't demand $7 million for a 10 minute appearance in a movie. Patrick
Stewart is actually taking a huge pay cut in the next Star Trek film,
Nemesis.
(Omni Prime)
178. Picard can spend more than 15 minutes on a
planet before being shot at or locked up.
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Kirk: "Delusions of godhood", apparently a Roman god or
Caesar. |
177. Picard's ship was never
taken over by a door-to-door salesman.
176. If the Borg had
assimilated Kirk, they wouldn't have learned anything.
175. Picard's
First Officer and Security Officer (Worf, not Tasha) eat the things that attack Kirk in alien forests.
174.
Imagine you have to impose your authority: "This is Captain Jean Luc Picard of
the Federation Starship Enterprise". Now introduce yourself as "James Tiberius
Kirk, but you can call me Jim." See the difference?
173. Picard's
phaser fires a burst of potentially lethal energy. It does not fire a stream
of red felt-tip pen.
172. Picard blows up another starship more than
once a season. Also when he does, it's for a damn good reason.
171. Kirk fights like Adam West. Pow!
170. Picard can
climb rocks without falling off.
169. Picard's uniform fits.
Particularly around the midriff.
168. Picard's engineers never lie to
him about how long it takes to fix something, because no one, not even
Starfleet engineers, mess with Picard.
167. Picard knows how to make a
starship last. Kirk has gone through 3 already; that's a trifle
careless.
166. Kirk is so boring he's caused several computers to
self-destruct merely by talking to them.
165. Picard never has to sign
an Etch-a-Sketch attendance register kept by Yeomans with hair like a
helter-skelter.
164. Picard never has pretentious episode titles like,
"For the world is hollow and I have touched the sky".
165. Picard would
never wear eye makeup. Ever.
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Picard firing a phaser rifle alongside Worf firing a "24th
century bazooka" (if you find out what it's really called,
email me). |
164. Kirk has to fight Klingons to get his
way. Picard only has to tell them what to do.
163. Kirk once made a
cannon out of bamboo, sulfur, potassium nitrate, & charcoal and used it to
fire diamonds into the hearts of his enemies. Picard is a starship captain,
not MacGyver.
162. While Kirk did make most of the decisions aboard his
ship, this was only because advice from his crew was almost exclusively
limited to "That's illogical Captain," "It's worse than that, he's dead, Jim,"
"It's life, but not as we know it" and "Klingons on the starboard bow." Small
wonder really.
161. Picard would never have let his second in command
irradiate himself in the engine room.
160. One word: SQUISHED (what
would happen to Kirk and his ship had he met the Borg and tried to deal with
them in the same manner as he deals with most other things).
159.
Picard's crew are too sophisticated to be taken over by a bunch of women in
go-go boots and have the most intelligent person aboard controlled by a box
that has less buttons than a Super Nintendo joypad.
158. Picard never
shot his best friend's body into space using a photon torpedo.
157. Kirk
probably thinks a concerto is a kind of ice cream dessert.
156. Picard
doesn't need hair - real or not.
155. Picard's bridge doesn't sound
like an aviary.
154. The only way Picard would allow tribbles on his
ship would be as hors d'oeuvres.
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Picard commanding the Enterprise-E during a battle with
his nemesis, Shinzon. |
153. Picard has to contend with the
"Prime Directive" - a ruling imposed on him by Starfleet after they saw what a
complete shambles resulted when they let Kirk meet new alien
races.
152. Three words: seven whole seasons. Kirk's show was cut off
the air after three.
151. Picard has to contend with crap Starfleet
Admirals. If he stole a starship, he'd get vaporized, not given captaincy of a
new one like in the easy old days.
150. Picard didn't have to reprogram
a computer to give him better grades in order to graduate from Starfleet
Academy.
149. Picard doesn't need to wear glasses. Wait, why would Kirk
even need glasses in the 23rd century?
148. Picard can act out entire
Shakespearean plays, not merely remember 1 or 2 lines.
147. Picard's
worst episodes were originally written for Kirk.
146. Picard discovers
new life, new civilizations and strange new worlds, not discarded movie sets
from period 1950's dramas.
145. Kirk was a leader of followers. That's
the only reason he (almost) got away with it.
144. On Kirk's ship, they
used the English Measurement system on occasion, Picard's ship uses SI. In the 23rd
century who the heck would use the old English system? (Omni
Prime)
143. In a survey conducted by
startrek.com, the best Star Trek
episode ever turned out to be "The Best of Both Worlds", a TNG Episode. (Omni Prime)
142.
Kirk and Spock - The Lost Gay
Episode.
(very disgusting, there I warned you, so don't say I didn't)
141. Picard once saved the Enterprise from
terrorists, all alone, only with a laser cutter. Bruce Willis would be
proud.
140. Picard has never toyed around with history, but if he had
to, he always restored it as it was.
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Scenes from Star Trek: Generations |
139. Picard refused to take a
command until he had enough experience. Kirk took a command as soon as he
could - and was captured and held prisoner on every third mission.
138.
Ever hear the term no credit is worse than bad credit? Well, Picard has not
directed a Star Trek film, Kirk directed Star Trek V: The Final
Frontier, which is generally believed to be the worst Star Trek
film ever. (Omni Prime)
137. Picard is assigned to prevent Romulans from entering a Klingon
civil war. Kirk is assigned to protect bins of wheat from invasion
by tiny fuzz balls.
136. Picard succeeds in preventing Romulans from
entering a Klingon civil war. Kirk fails to protect bins of wheat from
invasion by tiny fuzz balls.
135. Picard's Enterprise has
"windows".
134. When Picard is bored, he reads Shakespeare (countless
TNG Episodes). When Kirk
is bored, he wrestles with young boys (Charlie X).
133. Picard's nemesis: an omnipotent malevolent
being (Q). Kirk's nemesis: a beer-bellied liar (Mudd). (Omni
Prime)
132. If Kirk wants a Bird of Prey, he has to steal one. Picard just has to ask, and the Klingons give him one.
131. When
Picard's Enterprise cloaks, it can travel through solid rock.
130.
Picard never got obsessed by the idea of killing a *cloud*.
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While Kirk drives Tractors, Picard drives
the ARGO (really, he did 90% of the driving in ST:X) |
129. When
Picard gets captured by Romulans, he fights his way out. When Kirk gets
captured by Romulans, he pretends that he's dead until they go
away.
128. When going into warp, Picard's Enterprise changes shape and
disappears in a brilliant flash of light. Kirk's Enterprise just makes a
whooshing sound.
127. Picard's science officer has perfect recall,
knows the Vulcan neck pinch, and *never* sleeps.
126. Picard can
actually speak to an android of high intelligence and be
understood.
125. Picard can pilot the one of the largest ships in the
Federation (The Enterprise) though a mine/asteroid field while running on back
up power and impulse engines offline. (Omni Prime)
124. Kirk never
said "Abandon ship! All hands abandon ship!" because he was already out
of there at the first hint of trouble.
123. Kirk left the Enterprise to
become a police captain.
122. Picard is still on the
Enterprise.
121. Picard cares if the crew lives or dies.
120.
The Borg only assimilate intelligent life. If Kirk had met the Borg, they
wouldn't have assimilated him. They would have discarded him as space
debris.
119. Picard is alive. Kirk is dead.
118. Picard admits
he's made mistakes. It takes a real man to admit their
errors.
117. Picard never wore gray pajamas on the bridge.
116.
Kirk didn't have the good sense to turn down the admiralty like Picard
did.
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The ST:TNG Crew and the Enterprise-E. |
115. Let's face it....it may have made a great character
moment, but when you get right down to it, Kirk cheated on his biggest academy
test!
114. Kirk: Dukes it out with doppelganger; Picard: Doesn't
waste time: Shoots doppelganger with phaser.
113. Kirk has booze
given to him; Picard family makes its own damn wine.
112. Kirk: Sobs
like a baby when son dies (Star Trek III: The Search for Spock); Picard: Laughs like a hyena when stabbed through
heart (Tapestry).
111. Kirk: Chews crew members out for engaging in bar braw
(The Trouble with Tribbles); Picard: Takes on three Naussicans in bar braw (Tapestry).
110. Kirk: Subjects Spock to
court-martial; Picard: Allows Worf to whack a guy with only a
reprimand.
109. Football analogy: Picard is to the coach as Kirk is to
the water boy.
108. Kirk fights has-been Greek god, Picard worshipped
as a god.
107. Kirk bothered by mild astigmatism, Picard kicks ass for
forty years with artificial heart.
106. At academy, Picard noted for
marathon skill, Kirk called "stack of books with legs."
105. Kirk near
60: thinking of retirement; Picard near 60: still in prime.
104. Kirk
never told a member of the bridge crew to "shut up."
103. Kirk has
wimpy lunch served to him by Yeoman, Picard fixes own food in the replicator.
(Omni Prime)
102. Klingons: Drag Kirk to ice prison, allow Picard
to choose their leader.
101. Picard
is smarter than his first officer.
100. Picard can talk without pauses.
(Omni Prime)
99. Picard does not have an issue with his baldness,
while Kirk does. (Sky of October)
|
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The Enterprise NCC-1701-D |
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|
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The Enterprise NCC-1701 |
98. Picard fires both photon
torpedoes and phasers at the same time when in battle.
97. Picard's ship is better than
Kirk's -- bigger, faster, stronger, more elegant.
Here is proof in a
ship comparison:
Enterprise NCC-1701: Length: 288 meters Crew:
430
Enterprise NCC-1701-D: Length: 642 meters Crew:
1014
Enterprise NCC-1701-E: Length: 685 meters Crew: 800 (Omni
Prime)
96. Two words: better actor.
95. Picard can control his hormones
unlike Kirk (you know what I'm talking about). (Sky of October)
94.
Though admittedly he's seldom a patron, Picard's ship actually has a
BAR.
93. Picard is not a racist, unlike Kirk, who has said many times
how much he hates the Klingons (Star Trek VI espicially) (Sky of
October).
92. When nurse Chapel re-appeared as Troi's mother, she fell
for Picard.
91. In seven years, Picard never developed a gut like
Kirk's. (Sky of October)
90. Picard was never killed by his first
officer.
89. Picard's family made alcoholic beverages for a
living.
88. Kirk kept losing security guards throughout each season;
Picard has kept Worf for seven years.
87. No member of Picard's crew
was EVER based on a member of the Monkeys.
86. Kirk chose to never join
Starfleet and to instead follow an
easier path in Star Trek: Generations when he was in the Nexus. Picard
realized it was a fantasy and chose to save a star system as well as
convincing Kirk that reality was more important that fantasy. Also note, Kirk,
aware of his friends Bones and Spock, decided that if he had to do everything
over again, he would never meet them and follow his love Antonia. How's that
for a friendship? (Omni Prime)
85. Picard can do better impressions of his first
officer.
84. Picard single-handedly saved the Federation, the Klingon
Empire, and all of humanity while still a lowly captain. (Omni
Prime)
83. Picard's a better musician than Kirk, while admittedly
that's not saying much.
82. Kirk slipped onboard a Romulan Warbird.
Picard made it all the way to Romulus, infiltrated the capital, and made it
back to Federation territory. (Omni Prime)
81. Picard's crew
gambles.
80. Picard's engine room has that neat warp coil that
glows.
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Picard as best man for Riker and Troi's wedding. |
79. Picard's ship has better control panels instead of a series
of Lite-Brite boards.
78. Picard would never star in a show like "T.J.
Hooker".
77. Picard would never have allowed Charlie X aboard his
ship.
76. No sideburns. 'Nuff said.
75. Picard's first officer
never seized control of the ship to transport a former captain
anywhere.
74. Despite the Borg incident, Picard is still welcome back
at Starfleet HQ. Kirk's name is an anathema to Starfleet HQ and alien races
alike.
73. Picard never ordered his ship to self-destruct as a bluff;
when he orders it to do so, he MEANS it.
72. Picard's ship was never
taken over by its own computer and made to attack other Starfleet
vessels.
71. Picard has never been made into a bad Filmation
cartoon.
70. Picard was able to bring Denise Crosby back from the dead.
Need we say more?
69. Picard posed as an intergalactic mercenary and
was tortured extensively after capture by the Cardassians -- and never broke a
sweat.
68. Picard has never been demoted.
67. Picard has never
had his body taken over by a former lover.
66. Picard's science officer
is more logical than Kirk's. (Omni Prime)
65. Picard's science
officer can also think almost infinitely faster than Kirk's. (Omni
Prime)
64. While we're at it, Picard's science officer would of not
died from radiation like Kirk's did in Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan. (Omni
Prime)
63. Nobody ever back-slaps Picard.
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Kirk as seen in the TV show, Family Guy |
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62. Picard was never
involved in any hokey shootouts at the OK corral.
61. Stars can be seen
looking outside from the of the Enterprise-D and E.
60. One word:
Leadership.
59. Picard never let a bald midget in a dwarf ship with a
scary dummy fake him out for an entire episode.
58. Picard can speak
more languages than Kirk has ever heard.
57. Picard has never lost a
first officer to a man who once made a career out of selling Chrysler
Cordobas.
56. Picard would never be so stupid as to go rock climbing
without equipment and rely on an overweight first officer with rocket boots to
save him.
55. Picard would never stand for playing "Row Row Row your
boat" around a campfire.
54. When Picard enters a room, people fall
silent; when Kirk enters one, they keep on drinking.
53. Picard has
that cool, futuristic artificial heart.
52. When Picard has an
alternate reality experience, it's worth watching and caring about.
51.
Picard never expects the impossible from his engineer.
50. When
Klingons are aboard Picard's ship, they don't go rampaging about with 17th
century weaponry.
49. Picard has more class than Kirk ever
had.
48. If poor judgment were bricks, Kirk would be a housing
project.
47. Picard had the chutzpah to admit when he screwed up
instead of putting on a face which only made things worse.
46. Picard
doesn't rely on the Organians to help him settle intergalactic
squabbles.
45. Picard gets along with the aliens aboard his
ship.
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William Shatner in Splat Attack, a paintball
video |
44. Two Words: Better Voice.
43. One word: diagnostic
(Never heard it on the old show.)
42. All that cool technical jargon
(Also never heard on old show).
41. Picard is more highly recognized in
battles, e.g.: The Picard Maneuver. (Omni Prime)
40. Picard can
actually make being bald and middle-aged look sexy & macho.
39.
Picard listens to suggestions from his crew when out of options like a real
captain should. Kirk oddly has every idea on the top of his head. Sounds like
someone needed better script writers. (Omni Prime)
38. Picard has
never mutinied or had his crew mutiny against him (Omni Prime)
37.
When Picard gets drunk, he tracks mud all over the house and gets in a fight.
When Kirk gets drunk, he passes out.
36. Picard hired Whoopi Goldberg
to work in his bar.
35. Picard is not afraid to mind-meld.
34.
Picard's ex-wife kept his name even after the divorce; Kirk's ex-wife kept it
a secret even from her son.
33. Picard likes solving mysteries; Kirk
couldn't figure one out if he tried.
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Picard carrying Angi in Star Trek: Insurrection. |
32. Picard has never messed up
with the transporter.
31. Picard has never been bitten by a mugatto,
nor has he ever allowed shape-shifting salt vampires aboard his
ship.
30. Picard has never aged prematurely.
29. Picard wasn't
afraid to take on Satan.
28. Picard knows Gilgamesh and is able to
recite it.
27. Picard argues with his captors while being tortured,
Kirk merely screams in agony.
26. Picard never brought a woman back
from the 20th Century only to have her blow him off in front of the entire
Federation assembly.
25. When Picard talks, people listen.
24.
If Picard were a late-night talk-show host, he'd be Dick Cavett. If Kirk were
a late-night host, he'd be Chevy Chase.
23. No one laughs when Picard's
Doctor says, "He's dead, Jean-Luc".
22. Picard has never kissed a
Romulan.
21. Picard has never crashed in San Francisco bay in a pirated
spacecraft.
20. Picard would never have brought "Nomad" aboard his
ship.
19. If Khan came aboard Picard's ship, Picard would have had the
common sense to restrict what technical manuals he would've been allowed to
review.
18. If Picard found a huge glowing sphere in the middle of
outer space only to discover it was controlled by a child with an ugly puppet,
he'd be pissed.
17. Picard is a more realistic captain. Do you think
the United Federation of Planets would actually put a young captain like Kirk
in charge of the Federation's flagship? This idea is supported by Gene
Roddenberry Jr. (Omni Prime)
16. Picard
would never have dropped the charges against Khan.
15. Kirk actually
tried to defend the idea of intergalactic war with the Klingons.
14.
When Kirk went back in time, he frequently messed with history to suit his own
ends.
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Picard meets McCoy at the making of the first episode of Star Trek:
The Next Generation in 1987. |
13. Picard probably would have found the Galileo 7 in less time
than it took Kirk.
12. Three words: Better costume variety.
11.
Kirk tries, usually unsuccessfully, to respect other cultures. Picard tries,
usually successfully, to get other cultures to respect him.
10. Kirk's
occasional game of choice is 3-D chess, Picard's is poker.
9. When
Picard lost the Stargazer it was in a furious battle with a hostile, unknown
race. When Kirk lost the Enterprise it was a lowly self-destruct. (Omni
Prime)
8. Can't forget those neat collar insignias.
7. Picard's
not afraid to deal with more advanced cultures and has done so on a number of
occasions.
6. Picard's been on both Klingon birds-of-prey AND the
heavy cruisers (and lived to tell about it).
5. When Picard goes
undercover, he makes it look easy.
4. Though Picard has contempt for
aliens like the Cardassians, he doesn't let it show.
3. Kirk wears
boots -- Picard wears shoes. And as we all know, it's gotta be the
shoes...
2. Assimilating has never been a problem for Picard.
1.
Picard has never trashed Gene Roddenberry.
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Kirk the Romulan |
Ultimate Reason: Kirk Singing! Shatner's singing offers
unquestionable prove that Picard is better than Kirk. These songs were from
Kirk's only album, which may be the reason why he had only one album ;). (You
can use the music box (at the top of the page) to resume the background music
when you're done) To download a song or video, right click on the file name
and select "Save Target As...." I have the files stored by
Geocities, sometimes they fail to allow these files to be downloaded, check
back in a few hours and they may be back up.
William Shatner - Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds (.mp3 2:59, 2807KB)
Leonard Nimoy - Ballad Of Bilbo Baggins (.mp3 2:21, 2213KB) Yeah, it's not
Kirk singing, but it's still very funny.
The song even has a
music video! I will never think of Spock in the same
way again! The girls in the music video are very disturbing. If you want to
save this file to your hard drive,
right click
here and select "Save Target As..."
William Shatner - I Am
Canadian (.mp3 1:45, 1232KB) (the title alone is funny,
sadness)
William Shatner - Mr.
Tambourine Man (.mp3 3:24, 1399KB)
William Shatner - Rocket Man
(.mp3 4:06, 1687KB)
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